Zittende man met hoofd in de handen. Theo van Doesburg, public domain, via Wikimedia Commons
My brother
only sporadically wants to die
and quietly on the last night
of Hanukkah
he says yes, the never-ending virus — I am afraid,
but that is third on my list, he has a list,
first is climate apocalypse, second
there is international politics, a coup
in Germany—
he does not mention the man who called to him across
the frigid winter D.C. street, said “Kill yourself, Jew”—
Look! We are familiar
with Germany! The way you
are familiar with certain kinds of people;
I want him
to not think what he thinks, that
the natural state of humanity is to hurtle
toward fascism he says it is only the specter
of World War II that keeps us afloat I think of
gas chambers then, I think of how thin
my brother
is he says
I am doing well, it is just
I forget how few calories are in things
I forget how much calculation it takes to live.
—December 2022
This piece is a part of the Berru Poetry Series, which supports Jewish poetry and poets on PB Daily. JBC also awards the Berru Poetry Award in memory of Ruth and Bernie Weinflash as a part of the National Jewish Book Awards. Click here to see the 2023 winner of the prize. If you’re interested in participating in the series, please check out the guidelines here.
Caleb Horowitz is a Jewish North Carolinian poet, teacher, and penguin enthusiast. You can find his writings in Gashmius Magazine and Psaltery & Lyre. He also has several academic publications about Jewishness in pop culture, and his nonfiction can be found in Hey Alma! Caleb Horowitz is a member of Yetzirah: a hearth for Jewish poetry and attended the organization’s inaugural conference. He is working on a manuscript inspired by Jonah.